We're Doin' Alright

So now that I have two kids and have had them for 6 weeks and 3.5 days, I can safely say that we're doin' alright. It seems normal to have 2 kids now and I love the mother it's helping me to become. Don't worry, I still have "those" days (the ones where you don't think you'll make it out alive), but overall things have transitioned relatively smoothly. It's always hard once your mom leaves, moms make everything better, but once she was gone and I knew that it was me or me who had to take care of things, I somehow found the strength and determination to do it. Funny how that always happens. We're always so much more capable than we think we are.

But Noah is still the same sweet baby he was when he was born. All babies are beautiful, precious, and sweet, but some just seem a little bit more so than others...if you know what I mean. ;) He seems to already have the patience of a saint, he will wait for me while I take care of Soph--even if he's starving, he loves when you talk to him, and his needs are very basic. If he's dry, fed, and comfy, he's good to go. It might just be my confidence as a second time mom, but things seem so much easier this time around. I feel like I'm getting spoiled and that baby #3 will be our wild child since my first two have been so easy. Or maybe their teenage years are going to be their wild years--who knows! I don't know which I'd prefer, crazy babies, or crazy teens. How bout neither. :) We'll see, no one gets that lucky. haha

Soph is still great as a big sister. She genuinely loves her brother, and it's so wonderful to see her affection towards him. Apparently I wasn't so loving to my twin younger sisters, although I'm perfect so I don't know if I believe my mother's horror stories, but I'm grateful she is such a good girl with him. Rarely do we have to remind her to be gently, although she doesn't show too much interest in wanting to hold him yet, which might be a good thing right now. She has already developed so much more in her language and communication skills, probably out of necessity since I ignore her if I can't understand her because I'm so busy doing other stuff. She is so smart and the things she knows and understands amazes me everyday. Children are so much deeper than I ever understood and it truly is a testament to what Heavenly Father means when he says we should be more like little children. They are so forgiving and pure, no inhibitions or ulterior motives (yes, I just googled how to spell that word, totally thought it was with an a!), yet they aren't stupid. They still understand things so well, they just haven't been corrupted yet.

I'm doing alright too. Noah sleeps like a champ, so that hasn't been too much of an issue this time around. This time it's feeling guilty for always having the tv on to keep Sophie busy while I feed Noah or clean. It's not having the energy or time, or I should say not making the energy or time, to read my scriptures period, forget studying them. It's not feeling like I'm really communicating with my Heavenly Father and always remembering him. Most of the time I say my prayers in bed and fall asleep half way through. I feel lost sometimes, like I don't really know who I am anymore because I never have the time to think about it or worry about it. I am the dishwasher, the caretaker, the bathgiver, the diaper changer, the feeding machine, the food maker, the laundry doer, the mess cleaner upper, etc. etc. Don't get me wrong, I am so blessed with great friends and family who help me, especially my sweet husband Josh who always folds the clothes for me, but sometimes I think, should I have waited longer to get married and start a family? I never really had me time. But then I look at the rest of the world and my friends from HS who took that "me time" and aren't anywhere near as happy and content as I am and I think, I am so thankful I married the person I married in the right place and at the right time. And I know my children came when they were supposed to because I prayed about it and felt it was right and then Heavenly Father blessed me with healthy, beautiful babies. There is still a balance to everything and I take me time when I need it, like right now, but I know that my family is shaping me into the person I want to become more than anything else could. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason as I get older and see patterns and the causes and effects of things in my life. I know that Heavenly Father is indeed aware of me and my struggles and that he knows I'm doing my best. I think I feel guilty when I know I'm not doing my best. But sometimes even that's ok, it's impossible to do your best in ever area of your life.

I'm pretty sure Josh is doing ok too. I'm sure he feels like all he does is work, work, work! He is wonderful and always supports me and sometimes listens to me when I rant and rave about life, poor guy. ;) He is a great daddy and loves his family. He shows us everyday by working hard for us and by making sure we're taken care of. He is my other half and I couldn't do this without him.

Overall, we're all doing great. Noah is smiling more everyday and is starting to try to tell us all those thoughts we can see brewing in his mind. I just know he's going to have so much to say once he learns how to say it. I am so thankful for all I have, and I know that at this point in my life I am doing exactly what I should be--being a mother. As Noah gets older, I can start doing all these projects I have in my head that I want to accomplish, but for now I'm just happy to eat, shower, have a clean house, and maybe even a little makeup on. I'm so lucky and I count my blessings if not daily, then at least every other day. ;) haha

Here are a few pictures to show off how cute my kids are. =0)

So beautiful.

Easter baskets! I feel like such a grown-up/mom now that I'm the one who puts the eater baskets out. Sorry to burst your bubble if you still thought the easter bunny was real. :)

Daddy with the kiddos.

Mr. Man showing his personality.

Feet. I've been practicing with my awesome Christmas present that Josh got me. I'm doing ok, but there's definitely room for improvement. Photography is a lot harder than it looks, that's all I have to say.

My cute little darling!

Sophie on Easter.

Mr. Man.

Bath time--he looks a little psychotic here, but we swear he really is so cute!

Anywho, that's my life in a nutshell the last few weeks. Hopefully I'll be back again soon my adoring fans!

He's Here!

Noah Joshua Dickinson was born on 4/1/11 at 12:41 pm weighing in at 8 lbs. 6 oz. and measuring 19 3/4 inches in length. Phew! I never thought I had 8 lbs. plus of baby in me. :) He is healthy and strong and has one of the sweetest spirits. He is sleeping for 2-4 hours at a time, hallelujah! And he eats like a champ. We feel so blessed! My mom was here for a bout a week and a half helping us transition to having 2 kiddos. I miss her terribly and was so glad she was able to share this experience with me.

Sophie has adjusted to being a big sister beautifully. She is so sweet with him and always gets very concerned when he cries. She shares her blankets with him, although promptly removes them and says, "Mine!", we're working on that one, and is always rubbing his head or being sweet with him in some way. She has been craving more attention, but since she was not cuddly in the least before, I am loving it.

Labor, delivery, post-partum stuff has all gone so much smoother this time around. I don't know if he's just that good of a baby, or if it's Josh and I's confidence this time around, but it seems a lot easier. I keep waiting for everything to go to pieces, but so far so good. I know that day will come when Josh will come home and I'll just break down in tears because it's been one of "those days," but so far I love having two kids. I know what people mean now when they say their family is complete. We've been waiting so long for him to join our family, and now he's finally here. Yay!

I'll share my labor story later, nothing too exciting, although it was only like 4 hours, holy cow! And can I just say that I love epidurals. :) I so admire those women who do it naturally, but for now I am content with my pain meds.

My mom with the babes. (Love this picture!)

Here's me right before going in to get induced. Looking at this, I could believe there was an 8 pound baby in me. Whoa mamma was I big! Thank goodness I've gone down way quicker this time around, another pleasant surprise to being a second-time mom. Although those after labor contractions were quite the nasty little things. And yes, I surrendered and gave in to the temptation of Pitocin. And on April Fools, nonetheless, poor kid. I was already dilated to a 4, was 100% effaced, but was having 0 contractions and had been like that for about a week. I was dying. Or at least I thought I was. It literally felt like he was going to fall out when I walked, sat, breathed. It was probably a good thing I had him when I did otherwise I might have had to deliver a 9 pound baby. Then I probably would have died, for reals.

Here's my two awesome children loving on each other. How lucky am I?

Anywho, we're all doing great. I'm dealing with the baby blues a little, sometimes I just start crying and get incredibly sad for no apparent reason. But it's so much better than last time. Maybe it's having my own apartment this time around and not having to experience first-time motherhood in a house full of boys and other people, maybe it was having my mom here with me and not just visiting during the day, maybe it's my experience as a second-time mom, but whatever it is, I have immediate joy from this little man. He is a gentle soul and I know he was sent to our family, to me, for a reason. Let's just hope we do right by him. Lucky little devil. :)

It's a Baby...

Boy!! So on Nov. 15th we got to go and have our ultrasound. Baby is totally healthy and quite the little mover. I haven't scanned the ultrasound pictures in yet, but it's definitely a boy. And unlike with Sophie, I already knew what the name was going to be if this one was a boy. So, we're excited to say that this little man will be called Noah Joshua Dickinson.

I have always LOVED the name Noah, so I thought it was a great pick for this little boy. I was really shocked that it's a boy--I totally thought it was a girl (maybe because everyone in my family is a girl). But since Josh comes from a family of all boys, I guess the odds were in our favor. At least we know for sure we'll always have one of each. :) Now onto the clothes shopping since everything we have is totally girlie.

Sophie was so cute during the whole ultrasound. She kept saying, "Bebe, bebe!" She already gives my belly kisses and asks to see my "bebe" multiple times a day (I actually think she's trying to say bellybutton, she thinks it's really funny to see our bellybuttons, but I like to pretend that she's talking about Noah). haha I guess that's my right as a mother to make things up! But we're so excited to welcome this little man into our lives. Now I get to learn about scouting, the different priesthood levels, a mission, and all that good stuff that comes with having a son, although with girls you get to plan their weddings. :) And as Grandpa Dickinson said, at least we know the Dickinson name will live on. My poor dad has to rely on his siblings' kids to carry on our family name of Bateson. Sorry dad! But girls really are the best. :) Anyway, we can't wait to meet you Noah sometime around April 6th-ish.

P.S. Sophie better learn to share by April 4th, 2011 because...

we're...

!!

Yep, that's right, Baby Dickinson #2 is on the way.

Eek! Two kids?! What was I thinking...at least this one was planned.

Here's what Sophie had to say about the whole thing, "I'm not ready to share my mommy!" It's ok, she'll learn...hopefully.

D-Day for this little person is April 4th, 2011. I'm about 15 weeks along and showing quite a bit already. I've heard that happens when you have 2 kids close together. You find out you're preggo and then 2 days later--POOF! At least that's how I felt. I'll put up belly pictures soon. I want to be better about documenting this pregnancy week by week with pictures. I've been feeling great, I don't get very sick with my babies, sorry for those who do. Some days are worse than others, but overall I feel less tired with this baby. Even though I have Soph, with my first pregnancy I was working, in school fulltime, and had a hefty church calling. Now I still have a hefty church calling and a baby, but I don't have homework, I don't have to walk to and from school in the snow everyday, and even though I work 2 days a week, it's not bad at all. I do need to be better about exercising though. I feel fat--without the ph. But I'm grateful to be able to have children. We're so excited for this little person. I hope it's a boy, I already have a name (which I'll reveal once we find out the sex in mid to late November). I guess I'll be happy if it's a girl....j/k! At least we already have all the girl stuff. Healthy, happy, and a good sleeper is all I care about. :)

The Last Little While

Soooo, here's a little something to satiate those tastebuds of yours. I've just come to accept the fact that this is more of a quarterly blog, not a daily, weekly, or even monthly one. ;) But I am more determined to capture the moments in ours and Sophie's lives. So here's some pictures and a couple of videos, hopefully they load, of the last little bit.

At the Puyallup Fair with Spongebob. She liked him, surprisingly enough. She kept trying to pet him like a cat.

At the beach in Cali with mommy. Ow ow!

Eating leftover strawberries and chocolate from the wedding. Yum!

Sophie carries on her mother's legacy. Don't ask. :) And don't worry, I didn't actually let her eat any...I think.

The happy couple holding the cutest baby (although she was pretty wiped at this point in the day, we all were)

Isn't where we live BEAUTIFUL? This is a new walkway they opened up going down to the beach that we love!

So handsome and pretty. :)

Sophie at my sister Cheyanne's wedding getting a kiss from her cousin Jordan. Muah!

At the beach in Cali--how I miss nice beaches with sand instead of rocks and dead jellyfish.

Sophie and Jordan playing in the sand.

Sophie does all kinds of stuff right now. She's running around like crazy, she's started climbing things, oh dear, she says all kinds of words, and she's learning karate. That's right folks, she's a ninja! And it's the cutest thing I've ever seen. Sometimes I look at her and can't the baby that she once was, it's amazing how they change and grow. I always wondered what she would look like as she got older, and now it's so neat to see who she's becoming. Her baby fat is starting to disappear, he legs are slimming and straightening out, and she's starting to look more like a little girl and not a baby. :( Sad, but good at the same time. Her hair is getting longer, and she has tons of teethers coming in. Her little toothy, gapped smile is so endearing to my heart. It's the best smile in the whole world. Some of the words she says are: bapple (apple), nana (banana), dogdog (dog), kitty (I hope you know what this is), uvoooo (love you), bapa (grandpa), mama (mom or grandma, depending on who she's talking to), brapes (grapes), Dat (Uncle Matt), Dadam (Uncle Adam), Drew (Uncle Drew), she doesn't really say her auntie's names cause she never sees them (sorry!), and I'm sure there's more, but I can't think of them right now. She'll repeat, or try to repeat, pretty much anything we say.

Anyway, I love her and I am so thankful that she seems happy and is heathly and is showing me how to love the simple things in life again. I love being a mom, I have people ask me that sometimes, "Do you like being a mom?" I think, you have to ask me that? I LOVE being a mom! The sleepless nights sometimes are the hardest part for me, but I love just about everything else. She has helped me to be excited for the littlest things again because she is excited for them. I worry about teaching her to stand for what's right in a world that makes you feel bad for doing so, but I know that if I teach her the Gospel and lead by example, the rest will follow. I am so grateful to have the Gospel as my guide. And she goes into Nursery in December--I CANNOT believe that! We're excited for the holidays because she's old enough to kinda get them. We're gonna be the Flinstones for Halloween (her hair is perfect for Pebbles!). Now I just gotta make the outfits. Blah! But at least we'll look hott! Woot woot! Anyway, toodles! I'll try to post more throughout the holidays!

P.S. Josh got laid off about 2 months ago and we still haven't had any luck with a job, so if you hear of anything near Tacoma, WA, let us know!

Sophie's Pink Little Pony :)

Here's a video of Sophie riding her little pink pony. Grandma and Grandpa Dickinson got her this pony for her birthday and she loves it! It's so funny to watch her ride it. She truly is my daughter, she loves horses. That's my girl! She cracks me up! Love you soo much Sophie! I can't believe I uploaded a video! It actually worked! Yeah! Many more videos to come, but for now I've got to go. Toodles!

4th of July

So the Fourth of July here was ridiculously cold--no, freezing is more like it! We took some pictures to document just how cold and windy it really was. The fireworks really weren't even that great, but it was still fun to have Josh there. This is the first 4th of July he's been with us in about 3 years or more. Every year he has to work on the 4th, so I loved that part. Of course, the week after the 4th it was blazing hot. Washington weather is so weird! But I still love it here, it's beautiful and so unique--I mean, I got to watch fireworks over the water for free at a golf course! So cool! I loved the way it lit up the water and Sophie would just say, "Oooooo!" Everytime one went off. It was soo cute! She fell asleep right before they went off because it doesn't get dark around here in the summer until like 10 or 10:30, so she was tired. But she woke up part way through them and loved them. All in all, it was a lot of fun. And cold. :)

Our family!

Matt trying to fly. I love this picture because the blanket is blurry, like it's moving, but he's not. So cool!

Daddy and Sophie.

Everyone playing on their gadgets trying to stay warm and waiting for the fireworks, it took FOREVER!

Grandpa and Sophie. Everyone wanted to hold her because she's like a little heater. :)

Cute girl! We got her a bow to wear to church for the fourth, I love it! She's so cute!

Mommy and Sophie! I love how her eyes are soo blue, and mine are so brown, looks kinda cool in pictures.

Mommy and daddy getting blown away!

She really does look like she's getting blown away.

Sophie and Grandma, look at her cute hair!

We missed all of our other family that we couldn't be with on the fourth, i.e. my family. But you were there in spirit! Love you all and happy fourth! I'm so thankful to all those who fight for our freedom and to be able to live in a country where I can worship how I want. The Gospel is so important to me and I can't imagine living somewhere where I wasn't allowed to live it. I am proud to be an American.